The Innerself: Undiscovered

Something from inside speaks to me;

 when I read, while I observe and when I watch.

It motivates and disappoints, gives happiness and sorrow,

 arouses courage and fear.

It takes me to the other world,

in dreams and in fascinations.

It decides my today and tomorrow,

wrong or right, yes or no.

Curiosity is at its zenith 

to understand its physical and emotional parameters.

All I have learnt and heard limits my perception.

 Each initiation intrigued is left with a set of words.

I am left with a blur picture, diluted with worldly words.

My only wish is to erase all I have learnt,

heed for a fresh start, a fresh beginning.

To understand it, not in mere words but in its real form.

Are you SMART?

Instructions before you read:

1>Please feel free to skip questions if you don’t know or do not wish to answer.

2> Also do not stress on questions as you will not be graded.

Here I start:

Q1) Which elementary particle is attracted to an electron?

Q2) Which pole of a magnet is attracted to the south pole of the magnet?

Q3) Which gender is attracted towards female?

I hope you answered all the questions honestly. Now let’s analyze little bit. If you got all the answers correct you may have noticed that all the answers have something in common. So, here is a fourth question, what is it? Noticed? Noticed? Noticed? Ohk Take time………. Not yet. Let me tell you, all are opposites. Right? Keep this conclusion in mind and continue reading.

Many say that future generations are smarter than the previous ones. This implies that if we go back in time we will find fools and if we go to the future we will find smarts. I would like to see that mid era when we were at neutral point on the time scale of foolishness and smartness. I wonder what people call that era. 

Once Einstein quoted, “I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of fools.” Sometimes I doubt about our generation and the generation mentioned by Einstein.  Look at today’s scenario of the world around. What Common name do the devices bear these days? Is it “SMART” what came through your mind. If it is the same then I wanted the same. SMART phones, SMART tablets, SMART Watches, SMART Television and the list go on. All these devices flourishing in the market and most of us are attracted to them. Do you still remember the Common thing we had figured out while answering the questions above? Yes, opposites.

Do we need a conclusion? I think it’s all ready done in our introduction. Last question, do you have a smart device? :P

This is my first recited poem "The Roadside Stand" by Robert Frost.

 I would like to thank

 Mr. Santhosh Kumar Kana ( PGT English, Kendriya Vidyalaya Kathmadu ) 

for his motivation and appreciating my work. 

I am also thankful to my friend Sefali Agrawal who helped me to  recognize my potential.

 

  Examinations

It was a year left and then a month for the ultimate test Boards for all the twelthies. Though there are very precise devices to measure time but still flow of time is never felt the way it moves.

February the slight fever could be felt. Everyone seen with books and saying “aab to padhna padega yaar bas ek mahina hii reh gayee hee”. The same line gives you motivation and dread both. Teachers always expect students to be prepared before a month of boards but it’s just the opposite. It’s when the preparation starts.

In no time just a week left and self-study time starts. An alarm was set for March 1^st. We felt, it is English we can do it in a day or two. The next day I woke up and felt the effect of yesterday’s snack at the restaurant. My Stomach going wild after every few minutes. You are always advised not to have eateries from outside but who cares. Never happened so what would today make a difference. But it does.

With running stomach and knocking head one can do nothing but go through English texts. It gives you pleasure and preparation both. I don’t know about others but my English preparation started a week before. 

It doesn’t matter how experienced you are with examinations you can always feel its fever at any level. It always happens during examinations you need a break after every chapter and sometimes after paragraphs. My hands magnetized towards my cellphone. Logging to social networking sites during each break and chat pops out saying “How much have you prepared? I haven’t started yet.” No matter how much you have done 

your reply is always same.

I think the best way to prepare during exams is to solve sample papers.  It gives you an idea of how much you know. You are able to find your strong and weak points. Someone has rightly said “The best practice is to match practice. “ This gave me an idea of why not solving sample papers exact at that time when the examination starts. And it really works. You train your mind as the situation demands.

As I said flow of time is never felt and I was in the examination hall. The 3 deciding hrs of your year’s hard work and few months sacrifices.  First day of examination and I can see all faces whispering a silent prayer. Since I had done with sample papers at same time before, it wasn’t a wrapped in a wonder for me. Examination hall is not a place to experiment with questions but prepared results at the tip of your pen.

The moment you come out of the examination hall you search for “your” company. If your exams were up to your expectation you will search for cheerful faces and your subject teacher else the one who is in your team.

Three days to go and battle with physics starts. It’s a subject which scares everyone. The most hated part is the derivation. Sometimes I felt that scientists never had intention to load all their experiments and papers on students, it’s the educationists who have done it. And most of us curse those genius scientists. Three days without distracting myself solved as many problems as I could. I was quite good with the theory part so needed a glance of it.

5^th march 10:15 am physics paper in my hand. I opened the middle page and saw a question which was very familiar with me. It gave me a slight upliftment. The 15 mins are not just to read the questions. Its time when you have to structure your answersheet too and prepare some of the answers. Some questions will make you feel that you can do it easily but when its time it’s out of your head. You feel that the equation is in your head. You just need a recall but this doesn’t happen. 

Its time you have to return the answer sheets. A student just asking a minute or two and the invigilator replies “Two minutes has 120 seconds my dear” and snatches it. Out of the class all you can see is surprise faces.

As physics got derivations chemistry has got reactions. One has to remember the reactions by hook or by crook. Reactions are like atoms and molecules of the subject. You don’t mention them; they don’t mention your marks. Sometimes I felt that if I had done this part earlier. I think the 5 days gap I was totally mad. Studying for fun and studying for exams are like two faces of the coin.

11^th March, Chemistry paper in my hand and I look around for a while. Nothing but cheerful faces. No doubt we are going to rock the papers. Everyone were done with the paper in just 2 hrs.

Mathematics and nine days in hand. More gaps more relaxed you feel. One of the coolest thing about math’s is no theory to remember. What you need to do is just practice.   

Computer and physical education to go. Just a day for computer and a fast revision was only possible. Some subjects you don’t have to work hard. One just need theme of the chapters. Physical education was a book never opened throughout the year. I think most of us were more concerned with the postures then with the texts. After all picture speak more than words!

We had done with all the papers a day before the colorful festival “Holi”.  I wish my batch for colorful results.       

     

  

Why Me?

WHEN the teacher entered the class and asked me to answer a question,  I thought Why me?  When the bell rang, and I was first to run out of the class,  and the teacher got angry,  I thought Why me?  During exam, I was the one caught cheating,  and I thought Why me?  When results were out, and I was the one to get red circles,  I thought Why me?  But after years of asking Why me,  after years of committing mistakes,  and after years of correcting it,  I can finally say TRY ME!

Why Dreams drive low?

It is often seen that when someone asks a child what do you want to become? Doctor, engineer, pilot are some common answers. These days’ children say actor, musician and sportsman too. Dreams are really big for everyone during initial days. Some want loads of money, some fame and the list goes on. But what happens to those dreams as we grow up?

Ask a man what his dream was. Many may simply laugh! Yes it can be a doctor who wanted to become a sportsman or an engineer who wanted to become a musician! Cases may vary. But I ask why you give up those lively dreams. Are we being practical? Is it the reason? Or we just give up? But why do we?

If the answer is being practical then I hope your answer is an activated complex. A man with high dreams and willpower doesn’t need a catalyst to proceed for the achievement.

With this I conclude because I know you came across the answer. And believe me live with those dreams. It is yours. You will achieve it. 

Impression of the City of Nawabs

Perhaps everyone know about The City of Nawabs but some may not. Let me unveil the name of the city; it’s Lucknow. My journey started from Nepalgunj. It was five in the dawn when my alarm clock waked me up. I am always in rush especially in travels. So this time was also the same. Crossed the Nepali-India border of mid- western region of Nepal and reached Rupaidiha.

 Now the real journey started. It was about six and there were two options either to take the bus to Bairaich and then to Lucknow now or take bus direct to Lucknow after an hour. Why waiting and wasting an hour! So took bus to Bairaich. Bairaich is some 52 kms from Rupaidiha. Reached there in some one and half hours. Some refreshments in Bairaich and then enquired about the timing of bus to Lucknow. One funny thing about Bairaich was I was searching for washroom in the bus park. After some struggle I got a point where there was an arrow showing to small room (ladies washroom) and another arrow towards field for men’s. Lucknow is some 142 kms from Bairaich. Everything was moving smooth just before I bought mazaa at Ram nagar street vender (75 kms before Lucknow). They had stopped bus for some time may be for lunch. I went to take mazza and bus moved with such a furious speed that it wasn’t in sight within seconds. Oh my god! This had never happened with me. And it was a challenging moment. What to do? My bag is in the bus. Some people laughed, joked while some helped us. I called one of my brother who studies in Lucknow for help.

 I took another bus to reach Lucknow which was about 30 minutes late than the one which had left us. I didn’t know the system these Indian Government Transport Officers sorry conductors and drivers follow. They must have asked if anyone is missing or the people sitting beside should have informed. India such a huge country of 100 million people. If people started caring for strangers than what would happen perhaps a paradise.  In this case our Nepal is best. My brother reached Kesarbagh (Bus Station) to take our bag and also the cash which was left to pay. Nothing was precious in the bag. It had just my brush, paste and few medicines. Still property is property.

By the time I had seen some parts of Lucknow through the window near Gomti River called as Gomtinagar. Constructions were huge, broadened roads, statues of martyrs etc.  This was the modern part of Lucknow. Really the magnificence couldn’t be illuminated in words. For once I thought why these developments don’t happen in our country. SAHARA, FUN and MEGA were the largest malls of the city in descending order. So after reaching Kesarbaag we went directly to Immambada which is commonly known as BHULBHULAIYA. It had marvelous architecture but people engaged in the monitoring the visitors and tourists were not respectable. Their behavior was decent just for them who followed there instructions. Taking guide, submitting ones shoes under protection just for money were some of their instructions. They cautioned us if you leave your shoes without any responsibility it may not be there when you come back. So we had to follow all the instructions except one and that was taking guide. I desired to discover the BHULBHULAIYA on my own. Me and my brother for some time were lost in the building. But after seeing a family taking guide we followed them and finally exit. BHULBHULAIYA was the place where NAWABS lived. There is a saying “Banaras ki subha aur Awadh ki saam”. Nawabs decorated the city with lots of light and bouquet in the evening. Their use to be dances in different parts. These all made the night splendid as the saying. But Nawabs are in no condition today. They all have disappeared.

People in India are really amazing. All busy in something. When I came down I saw a man from the top saying “Aap ko paper ki awaz aa rahii hee?” he was shaking the papers so why wouldn’t people listen the sound? After lots of clicks we entered another part of IMAMBADA. There is a well where it is believed that a key is lost. It is said that many have tried to search but failed. The key is the only way to open the TIGORI in the main IMAMBADA. Well they are believes I am not sure about it. Exploring the BHULBHULAIYA was the best part and getting lost in some mid-way was challenging.

After this we went to JANPAT and HAZARATGANJ. These places constructed by Britishers during their rule. HAZARATGANJ was something like KATHMANDU’S DARBAR MARG. Everything branded. We had samosas in JANPAT. They were great. I think TIP TOP was nothing before them. We had spent some two to three hours there. After that we reached VIDAN BHAWAN. I could see people talking of politics. Some talking of Mayawati’s job to change the map of Lucknow. Some rikshawala cursing her. One of them said how did she do? She sucked our blood and erected huge buildings and parks. But we are starving. These parks and buildings are good for foreigners not for us. She did nothing for us; farmers. The other party gave each farmer a cow and some cash. CM Aklesh Kumars party won the election and is presently running the state. He has a good education background as well as political background. So people believe that he will do well for the people.

I was passing through the LUKNOW HIGH COURT. Amazed with the number of people. And many wearing the advocates dress. I had never seen advocates wearing that dress in Nepal and the mass it had in Nepali courts. Are Nepali advocates always informal? Also I could see advocates advertising themselves. I could see large boards on top of each shop advertising an advocate.

It was about 5 pm. We needed some refreshments. So we went to SAHARA mall. It was huge. Had coffee and garden-fresh air. Then we went to KFC. Since it was the time of NAVRATRI I could only take veg items.

It was time for some shopping. We went to AMINABAD. It was like a vegetable market. I saw a person asking for NCERT R.D SHARMA in stationery. And the assistant asking me “ ARE BHAI USKO SAMJHAU!” Overall I had seen almost all parts of Lucknow in just a day. There was no option to stay; any how I had to be present in my hometown the next morning. I reached bus park at 8 pm. If I take bus early then I would reach border at 3 am. And had to wait for local transport. So it was better to take another bus which was to move at 10 am and reach at 5. The two hours of exploration in the bus park started. Some running to catch buses, some sleeping on the floor mostly the Nepalese from rural part who had come for medical treatment. I also found a Nepali waiter in the restaurant where I had my dinner. He was from ROLPA. He also explained me how they were treated here.     

Overall the journey was fantastic with some challenging instants!